


Things Nanosuit Operators are not allowed to do

by Cheemingwan9



Category: Crysis Series (Video Games)
Genre: Boredom and Stupidity., Humor, Maximum Stupid, Nanosuits, Skippy's List
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:15:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25159849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheemingwan9/pseuds/Cheemingwan9
Summary: With the powers of Nanosuits to turn soldiers into post-human warriors, you are thinking that they would not do stupid things with the Nanosuits. Nah, the first thing anyone would do upon getting such advanced technology is to use it to do stupid things. With that in mind, I present to you Things Nanosuit Operators are not allowed to do.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	Things Nanosuit Operators are not allowed to do

  1. (For males) Not allowed to use Cloak to sneak into the female bathrooms.

  2. (For females) Not allowed to use Cloak to sneak into the male bathrooms.

  3. The phrase "I am bulletproof!" is not allowed when Maximum Armour is engaged in combat.

  4. Making minigun noises while operating the Hurricane Minigun and screaming "Now is coward-killing time!" is also not allowed in combat.

  5. Female nanosuit operators,stop ogling the asses of the male nanosuit operators when they are in their nanosuits.

  6. We know that Prophet has a nice ass, please stop those looks.

  7. Male nanosuit operators, please stop ogling the female operators anywhere on their bodies when they are in their nanosuits.

  8. Honestly, if there was a Nanosuit calibrator that only affects the Cryfibrils in the groin region, we would be using it on you perverts.

  9. "I saw this in Pretty Cure" is not a good idea for abusing Ceph power sources to pull off anime attacks. The last time two idiots tried to pull off a "Nanosuit Marble Screw" it ended up carving a line of destruction in the base.

  10. Neither the statement "I saw this in Dragonball" . What part of "Do not use Nanosuits and Ceph power sources to pull off anime attacks" you do not understand!

  11. Reika "Breeze" Aoki, please stop using Ceph weaponry to create ice fields.

  12. Yes, I saw your creative usage of Ceph weaponry to fight a clown-ink monster thing and kill it. No, that's not how they are supposed to work.

  13. Psycho, you are banned from the Power Rangers and Super Sentai franchise for the rest of your life.

  14. Yes, those poses just had to be followed by explosions, am I right Psycho?

  15. Hand seals do not improve the effectiveness of Cloak. We tried that.

  16. No, we are not developing a cardboard box to complement the Nanosuit in stealth operations.

  17. About the Russian Nanosuits, no they are not powered by seeds and vodka.

  18. No, they are not supercharged by hardbass either.

  19. No, wearing a cape with your Nanosuit does not make you able to fly.

  20. Calling out "Consecutive Serious Punches" while in Strength Mode does not tremendously improve the destructive powers of your punches.

  21. Aoi "Gelato" Tategami, please stop abusing Ceph weaponry and the Strength Mode of your Nanosuit to coat your fists with ice.

  22. On second thought, CryNet Systems looked at your idea of freezing your enemies with your punches and has created prototypes for use with the Nanosuit.

  23. Nanosuit 2 operators, please stop making fun of the Nanosuit 1 operators for the sizes of their Cryfibril muscles and their fit.

  24. (Sigh). Urara "Lemonade" Kasugano, NO! CHAINS ARE NOT APPROVED MELEE WEAPONS!

  25. Lita "Jupiter" Kino, standing in a thunderstorm wearing your Nanosuit is not a good way to recharge the energy of your Nanosuit.

  26. No, gathering gold rings does not increase the effectiveness of Speed Mode of the Nanosuit.

  27. Or the phrase "Ándale! ¡Ándale! ¡Arriba! ¡Arriba! ¡Epa! ¡Epa! ¡Epa! Yeehaw!". Aztec who is of Mexican descent has to debunk this in front of all of you just to shut all of you up.

  28. Now, regarding that incident with the Star Twinkle PreCures that involved a Nanosuit team opening fire onto them. Prunce is NOT a Ceph and has no connection to them!

  29. No, Cupcake does not have a stash of bara manga in his quarters, why did you ask?

  30. Lotus, about your idea of remote operated nanosuits, if CryNet Systems decides to develop one, the building costs of the prototype will come out of your paycheck.

  31. About that video that was leaked that shows Nanosuit Operators pulling off the role call of Go! Princess Pretty Cure in their Nanosuits, please do not do that again.

  32. On the other hand, it did give CryNet Systems some publicity.

  33. Stop comparing Prophet,Alcatraz and SECOND to Hotaru Tomoe,Sailor Saturn and Mistress 9. No,seriously please stop.

  34. No, CryNet Systems is not developing supersoldiers spliced with the DNA of Red List animals as an alternative to the Nanosuit programme.





End file.
